I don't want to be a Toys R Us Kid!

18 days since my last post. That's horrible. I'm sorry. So anyway, um, uh, yea:

So Jayk is on another call right now, Logan is sleeping, and I finally have a quiet moment to myself. I got a TON of stuff done today that I feel really good about. I finished all of the laundry, folded it, and put it away (sorry Kyra, it's got to be done ;-) ) and I picked up the house, vacuumed, and we rearranged our bedroom. Long story, but it ended with a new box spring and bed frame! LMAO! So all in all, it was a pretty good day. Now I just have one more assignment to do, and I'm done with my task list for the day.

I've completely caved on the quitting smoking thing. Jayk and I lasted 4 days and then we wanted to kill each other. So that's out. We'll try again soon though considering we don't really have the money right now to support this little nasty habit. I don't feel too guilty about it, so I guess I have the wrong mindset and may not be ready to quit smoking.

One thing I know I am ready to quit, is trying to figure out what the hell I want to be when I grow up. It's like I've been taking this self-inventory and I know that I don't like one minor but sort of major thing that I have control over in my life. I do not like my job/career path. It means nothing to me. I don't necessarily hate the job itself, but to me it's meaningless. I don't feel like I actually DO something by being employed by a multi-billion dollar blood sucking company. Imagine that right? So what do I want to be? I'm creative, but I do not know what kind of living my creativity could really make me. Just because I'm creative does not mean I have the talent to make money to earn my share. I'm smarter than the average bear, and am half way through my associate's in business administration. How fucking boring is that? No offense to my business minded brother, and other business people out there, I'm just bored shitless with it.

I'm seriously considering changing my degree and have opted for student loans so I do not have to be dependent on my employer to completely pay for my schooling, therefore having to pursue something relating to their blood sucking ways. I know what I don't want to do based on my personal knowledge and my personality: I don't want to be a firefighter, EMT, or cop. I can't stomach what they see. I'd be committed to a mental institution after the first horrific scene. Plus I'd be too scared something would happen to me or Jayk for that matter, and leave Logan an orphan. I just can't do that.

I do want a career. I just don't know in what. I hate this. I'm not happy where I am as far as my career and income are at, but I don't know where I would be truly happy. Either one of two things have to happen: I either have to have a complete epiphany, or I have to start doing research about all sorts of fields of work. I'm almost 27 and it's like I have no direction. I could just stay where I'm at, but I really have no interest in what I do. Something that keeps popping in my head is to go towards the department of social services. But I have no idea what that entails. Blah. Time for more self inventory.

Any ideas? Suggestions? Is it too late at 27 to make a career change?